


The One with Ultron

by 0fficiallyLeah



Series: A.V.E.N.G.E.R.S + [9]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Civil War themes, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Hydra, M/M, Mission Fic, Natasha is hurt, Problems, Some Tony vs Steve, Team Dynamics, Tony is angry, bucky and Steve stick together, changes happen, implied references to past stories, sam is a good bro, team gets new stuff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-29
Updated: 2017-03-25
Packaged: 2018-04-06 20:37:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4235790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/0fficiallyLeah/pseuds/0fficiallyLeah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The problem with the Avengers was that they fought together as a team of superheroes, but they were individually regular flawed human beings. And it seemed like those flaws were slowly starting to destroy what they worked so hard to create. </p><p> </p><p>Or: Over months and missions, they have to find a way to fall back together in time to save the world.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The First Month

**Author's Note:**

> Watch tags as more chapters come.  
> Age of Ulton AU - Mostly w/o Whedon
> 
> **Probably REALLY NEED to read all other stories first**
> 
> no beta.
> 
> I do not own the Avengers. Obviously

The day after Loki had been to the tower was like a switch had been flipped inside Tony Stark. The man was a valuable part of the team, practically the second in command under Steve, and even if his sense of humor and his timing wasn't always deemed appropriate, he was in fact an important piece to the puzzle known as the Avengers. Which was why his abrupt change left a bad taste in Bucky's mouth.

It had started at breakfast. He made everyone their favorite morning meal - save Steve. Of course not before making sure that the entire tower was programmed to deny Steve access to any food, even on his own floor. Jarvis apologized, but couldn't override the locks. Nobody bothered to ask Tony why he had done this because it was a pointless conversation. Bucky had downed his french toast before realizing Tony's plan. If Tony had served him first, Bucky would've automatically been suspicious, but when it went Pepper, Natasha, Bucky, he forwent all other emotions and focused on his hunger. Pepper ended up giving Steve a black credit card and told him to buy all the food he needed when Tony had returned to his lab.

Unfortunately, other than trying to starve Steve, whose metabolism made him usually eat 3x a normal person, it also seemed the 'punishment' included pretending Steve wasn't even there. Which would be seen as a blessing for some, except for when they were a week into the punishment and had been called on a mission. A man off the coast of central America had been rumored to be smuggling in alien weaponry. It was to be a stealth attack from the air, seeing as he was anchored in the middle of the ocean, and Tony had conveniently pack one less chute than needed. Steve didn't care. He jumped anyways, but that was the day Bucky finally got fed up with 'Stark's shit'. Steve asked him to not start anything with Tony, so he was trying to play nice.

While he wasn't being a torment to Steve, Bucky was reminded of the 'I'm not touching you' ploy from when he had been a kid, Tony was being extremely, over-the-top, starting-to-get-creepy, nice to everyone else. Tony Stark was a multi faceted man - part brains, part money, part heart. Sadly for Steve, his heart was really in this. It wasn't his usual throw money at things kind of flourish, either. They were well thought out gifts. Three baseball season passes for Sam, Clint, and Bucky - even though Tony knew Steve had been working on watching baseball. He got Natasha a new Black Widow inspired gun cleaning kit and a promised year supply of Funions - Steve hated the smell of the chips. Bruce had made a distressed noise when he opened his gift at dinner one evening when he found what looked like a year's supply of his absolute favorite tea. The damn thing cost an arm and a leg, but it also had a smell that could win against Sam's socks after a workout. That was only one side of Tony though. The rest of his time was spent in his lab. He tinkered on Sam's wings. He made a new stealth suit for Natasha that could be lit to see in the dark and had tasers in the fists. Coulson and Natasha wouldn't allow Clint to have another bow to add to his steady collection of over two dozen, so instead he got a new quiver with double the usual storage. It wasn't until the fourth week that he came to find Bucky.

“Hey, I was watching that!” Bucky heard Steve bellow. They'd been watching the baseball game in the common room, before Bucky got up to make popcorn. He walked out of the kitchen to see Tony on the couch and the game no longer on TV.

“Stark, you mind?” Bucky called to him.

“Oh, sorry! I didn’t know anyone was watching something in here.” He switched the channel back and set the controller on the coffee table.

“You took the controller right out of my hand!” Steve complained.

Tony was almost to the elevator when Bucky reached the couch with his food, but he turned back as he waited for the doors to open.

“Hey Barnes, after the game's over, do you think you could swing by the lab? Bruce and I have been working on some stuff and I’d like to run something by you.”

“Uh, yea. Sure.” Bucky scowled at Steve as soon as Tony was gone. “You and your stupid face.” He muttered.

“What’s my face have to do with anything?” Steve asked, giving his best innocent look.

“I can’t tell your stupid face no.” Bucky crammed a handful of popcorn in his mouth to stop the blush rising on his cheeks.

“Yea.” Steve said with a dopey grin. Bucky shoved him off the couch.

Later Bucky went to the lab like Tony asked. It took up a whole floor in the tower, separated into three rooms with hulk proof glass walls. Bruce and Tony had their own working area and then a combined workspace. Whatever it was they were working on had them push back the wall between Tony’s and the combined workspace to allow for more room. Tony began to bounce on the balls of his feet when he saw Bucky. Bucky just barely resisted rolling his eyes. He wouldn’t put it past Tony to have just said all that to rile up Steve.

“Good. Good. Good. Okay, so Bruce and I were a little on edge about the whole ‘having a four year old being able to control you’ situation. So, first we decided we needed to create something that would be able to stand up against the Hulk. I’d like you to meet Veronica.” Tony said as he pulled up several holographic images.

“Tony and I created an Iron Man suit strong enough to stand up against the other guy. It’s currently in a location that is accessible from anywhere on the planet, given Tony has his suit. However, we thought that we might need a fail safe, if something were to happen and Veronica wasn’t an option.”

“Right now, the next stage is theoretical, but,” He threw new images up. “I took the liberty of taking some images of your arm when I worked on it. We think not only can we make you a better, lighter, maybe even more sensitive one, but we’d also like to explore the option of adding a way to calm the Hulk, even possibly bring Bruce back into control.” He made a ta-da motion.

“Do you think you'll be able to find something that'll work like that?”

“We literally spent this month working on Veronica and Tony's side projects. Everything else is still up in the air.” Bruce explained.

“But we’re hopeful.” Tony grinned. Bucky got the distinct feeling that there was more up in the air then what they were telling him.

“Let me think on it. Get some feedback.” He said pointedly, “And, I’ll get back to you.” Bruce nodded in understanding, while Tony simply pouted as Bucky got back on the elevator.


	2. The Second Month

Steve had always been a pretty patient person. That being said, Tony was seriously starting to grate on his nerves. He hadn't thought that things could get worse.

Natasha had been making brownies for Steve's birthday. That in itself made the day an anomaly. Out of the couple, Clint was the cook, but on special occasions she could be found in the kitchen baking - unless you had the balls to actually ask her to make you something.

Bruce and Tony had been gone to run tests on some uninhabited island, Sam and Clint were in the sub floors at the shooting range, and Natasha and Bucky were in the kitchen when Bucky had accidentally triggered her Red Room training. It took less than twenty minutes for her to go from looking like a robot that had just been shut down to someone in a coma. It took thirty minutes for the shock of what happen to ware off of Clint and he started taking his fear, nervousness, and anger out on Bucky. Clint refused to let go of Natasha's hand, refused to be separated from her side even while the doctors were running any test they could. Instead of taking it to the mat, where Bucky probably wouldn't have even defended himself anyways, Clint chose to use his words instead of his fists. He shot out words like he was shooting his bow, knowing exactly where they would his and how much damage they would cause. Bucky never tried to defend himself. Sam had to punch Steve to stop him from starting a fight in Bucky's defense, and once his senses returned Steve took Bucky far away from Clint. 

When Tony and Bruce finally returned a week later, they would've been back sooner but the gas they had been testing had a negative reaction on the Hulk. They did their own set of tests, before wanting a more detailed explanation than 'Bucky's evil'. Bruce had wanted any information that Bucky could provide about the trigger and it's uses, but Bruce only got a brief summary before Bucky broke out into his stream of apologies - he had done the same thing the first few weeks he was getting help from S.H.I.E.L.D whenever he saw Steve. Steve had hoped he would never have to hear him sound in so much pain ever again. The only thing louder than his apologies was Clint's declarations of killing Bucky in his sleep. 

Steve would've been worried about the threats if he or Bucky had been getting any sleep. As two people who had seen their fair share of horrors, some way more than others, they had been down to two or three nightmares a week between them. Now it seemed that all of Bucky's past was coming back to haunt him. After the first three nights of Steve being jolted awake because his air supply was being cut off, they began to have to find a way to calm the soldier in Bucky down. They hadn't found anything yet when Tony asked to speak to Steve in the hall. 

"Between the bags under you and Barnes' eyes and the nice five finger bruise you have around your neck," he stopped and sighed. "Look, I'm not done being angry with you. I don't trust you as a team leader or as a friend. That being said, the strain of not having Natasha around to keep us in line is going to tear this team apart. So, for now were gonna have to pull some kind of truce. At least until we can find a way to fix this."

"I've been working on that with Bucky. I thought there might be something in his past that might help us break the programming. The only problem is he's shutting himself down again. He's not sleeping. He gets maybe an hours rest before he's waking up in a cold sweat, out of breath, and looking to kill the nearest target. I can't leave him alone like that, which means I'm not sleeping either. If I could find a way to get him out of his head it would really help." Steve could've given Tony the speech he had been preparing about why Tony should forgive him and understand why he did what he did. However, he was taught to never look a gift horse in the mouth and if Tony was offering a chance to more or less put their problems behind them, he could do that too. This was his team, his friends, and that included Tony. Hopefully working together would remind Tony of that.

Tony, who always seemed ready with the joke on anyone, was actually better at pulling Bucky out of his thoughts. Maybe it was because his voice grated on Bucky's nerves, or maybe it was because they had more in common then they wanted to admit to, either way, Steve was grateful. The day after Steve and Tony had their talk, a record player and a box of famous music from the 30's and 40's was delivered to their floor. Steve waited the customary hour after Bucky went to sleep with the record playing inside their bedroom. Ray Noble was playing in the second hour when Bucky shot awake. However, he didn't try to murder the first thing he set his eyes on. It seemed the music was a big enough distraction to allow his head to catch up with reality. Though reality these days were bleaker than they had been and Bucky still decided to go to the gym instead of back to sleep. Steve knew that was his way to make penance. Steve went with him.

It surprised Steve how good Tony was with this broken version of Bucky. Clint, out of frustration, had barred him from the hospital room after Natasha had some fluctuation in brain wave activity but didn't wake up. Instead of letting him wander up and down the hallway in front of the closed door, Tony invited Bucky to his lab to help him with his side projects. As a show of good faith, Tony asked Bucky to help him create something to enhance Steve's uniform like he had done for everyone else. While they worked on schematics and ideas, Tony gave Steve the opportunity to sleep so he could keep watch over Bucky at night.

It only took two weeks for Bucky and Tony to complete their project for Steve. They created a easier and more secure way for Steve to handle his shield. The problem was that when Bucky was no longer preoccupied with working in the lab, he was back to wandering down on the medic floor. 


	3. The Third Month

Tony had pulled an all nighter, again, in his lab. The one month mark for Natasha's coma had been two days ago. Bucky was getting worse the longer she stayed the same, and Tony was desperately searching for a way to help. He was more or less blindly shuffling his way into the common room kitchen and was hesitantly surprised when Steve slid him a plate piled high with breakfast food. Steve waited until he had a forkful of food in his mouth before he started to talk.

"We may have a problem."

"You mean more than the shit ton we have on our plate now?"

"Language." Tony looked wide eyed around the room and threw his arms up in exasperation.

"Why is it no one is ever around when they need to be?" He grumbled.

"I'm tired. It just. Slipped out." He sighed and ran his hand down his face. "Anyways, I just spoke to Agent Hill. There's another arm's dealer in New Zealand. It's looking to be the same alien tech which means there's probably a supplier we're going to eventually need to find." _Once everything else is fixed_ was left unsaid. 

"So mission?" Steve nodded.

"I think you, me and Sam. Bucky is barely running on fumes and Bruce can stay with Clint while we're gone."

"I'm going."

Startled, both Tony and Steve turned to see Bucky hop over the back of the couch. He looked near dead - pale, huge dark bags under his eyes, greasy hair, he looked bone thin from malnutrition no matter how hard Steve tried to get him to eat, his human hand was bruised with cut knuckles no doubt from spending another night fighting his demons with a punching back. The physical and mental stress was tearing him apart. Even with the serum he had in his veins there wasn't enough time for his body to heal itself before he reached his breaking point and the cycle started over.

"Bucky, I don't think,"

"You don't have to think. It's my decision and I say you don't go on missions without me. So, you go get Sam, and I'll get our shit together."

"Language." Tony said in his Captain America impersonation: hands on hips, shoulders thrown back, head held high. Steve rolled his eyes.

* * *

They were in the middle of giving Agent Hill a rundown on what they learned, had only landed the quinjet twelve minutes ago, when Clint barged into her office. It was the first time they had seen him away from Natasha and were immediately on edge, all trying hard not to automatically assume the worse.

"Bruce said something about letting you try to get inside Nat's head. Said you were the only one with any experience on the matter." Clint looked rather opposed to the idea, but pushed on. "There hasn't been any change. If you think you can help her." He trailed off, but his point was made. He turned to leave the room with only the briefest glare, silently making it clear they were suppose to follow him.

With only Clint and Bucky in the medical room, Bucky was somehow able to get inside her head. Tony was itching to ask how he did it, but with how upset Bucky looked after being kicked out again, he didn't bring it up. Instead, Tony sought out Bruce.

The two 'mad genius scientist', aptly named by Tony himself, had yet to perform any actual tests. However, they had been keeping a log book about the similarities and differences between Steve and Bucky - or more to the point, between their serums. 

Steve couldn’t get drunk, but with enough time and a high enough alcohol content Bucky could get close enough to wasted to count without having a hangover in the morning. Bucky didn't drink often, it usually made the night terrors worse, but he was known on occasions to knock back enough hundred proof vodka to drown a horse and slip away from the conscious world. If he could have had his way, he wouldn't have spent one day this past month sober. Though, Tony knew, sometimes Steve was barely able to stop him from grabbing the bottle. 

Tony took Bucky and Steve back to the lab to get Bucky’s mind off things and to talk about what he wanted in his new arm. The only thing he asked for was to get rid of the red star. In it’s place Tony fell back to some of the old photos that had belonged to his father and taken inspiration from the wings Bucky used to wear on the shoulder of his Howling Commandos uniform. A week later, the arm was ready.

Another difference was the affect of sedatives and painkillers. What would knock out a normal human for say an hour, would only keep Steve out for twenty minutes, and Bucky refused to be put under. Painkillers on the other hand, Bucky was more than willing to take. It took Tony a few tries to create a new painkiller, part oxycodone part horse tranquillizer – definitely not FDA approved– for Bucky or Steve to actually not feel anything. Bucky had fallen asleep from the pills after forcing himself and Steve to fully watch Tony and Bruce as they removed his arm and up dated were it had been attached to his nerves and spines. He had to bite down on a wooden spoon to keep from telling them to stop. Steve couldn’t look at his face, instead making sure to keep his eyes trained on where Bruce was use electricity to test for nerve damage from the Hydra arm. Thankfully, any damage that he would've sustained was healing when given the chance. Bruce insisted they wait a day after removing all the intricacies connected to one arm before replacing it with the new one. 

It was a restless party for all involved. Not even thirty minutes after midnight, when Jarvis sounded the alarm to let them know Natasha was awake. Tony heard Clint, from three floors down yelling bloody murder for Bucky to get his ass in there. Tony belatedly realized Jarvies was allowing his voice to travel through the intercom speakers. Thankfully, Bucky had insisted on being located on the medical floor, instead of the lab. Tony had taken the stairs two at a time as he ran, knowing the elevator would take to long. Jarvis still had the speakers going and he heard Bucky shout out a Russian command. He got to the door just in time to see Sam moving to stand in front of Bucky. The the only thing keeping Clint from killing him on the spot. Steve had only just gotten to the room behind Tony, when Bucky swayed before passing out again - the lack of sleep for over a month paired with the numbness from the pain pills getting the better of him. Steve pointedly ignored Clint’s drawn weapon and moved Bucky to the sofa. 

When Clint finally put down his weapon on the bed side table, was when Tony noticed Bruce and another doctor by Natasha checking her vitals and all the things that were poking and prodding into her. There were tears on her cheeks.

“He’s not staying here.” Clint stated.

"What exacctly just happened?" Sam asked.

"She woke up, but her whole body was completely rigid and I could just tell she was in pain. Like, dying pain." He held her hand in one of his while his other gripped the arm rest on the bed, his knuckles turning white.

"It looks like her brain almost hemorrhaged. If Barnes had been any later. Well, it was close." The other doctor said.

"Get him out of here. Next time, missing arm or not, I'll tear him apart."

Tony heard Steve give a tired sigh as he scooped up Bucky, obviously sticking to his boyfriend's side of things. Tony could respect how loyal a person Steve was. He just wished some of that loyalty was directed at him. Betrayle was a hard thing to get over, Tony thought he would've learned that by now.

A couple of days after Loki showed up in his home, Tony had gone to see Professor Xavier. He wanted to know how someone could allow a war criminal like Loki to raise a child that could potentially destroy all of mankind. Unfortunately, Charles saw his logical reasons of complaint as being melodramatic and instead chose to show Tony exactly what he had seen when he read Loki and Thor’s mind. Needless to say, Tony could understand Thor’s stance on things - adoptive or not, they were brothers. However, Steve chose the side Tony couldn't trust, which made him the enemy too.

Tony was surprised by the bitterness he was feeling in that moment. Without really meaning to, Tony, found himself distancing from Steve, and by association, Bucky. He and Bruce attached the new arm. It was everything he said it would be - lighter, stronger, better efficient, more sensitive. After, they all went their separate ways, and if anyone noticed he was less accessible in his lab than he was before, no one said anything.

Four days later, near dawn, Natasha finally woke up. There was maybe half an hour of relief before the bottom fell out again.


	4. And So It Begins

Once she was allowed to leave the medical floor, Natasha discovered that Bucky didn’t seem to trust himself to be alone with her. However, Sam had taken it to heart when Clint had asked him to watch over Natasha. At first she had been adamant about not needing him to babysit her. Her instincts had told her to recoil and push people away, but Sam refused to back down. She pushed and he pushed back. She was grateful for that. She was surprised when he moved into the guest bedroom on Clint’s floor. Every morning he greeted her with a big smile and breakfast. It took her about a week, with bad nightmares and even worse days, for her to decide to move back to her own floor and Sam followed.

Bucky and Steve switched off sparring with her twice a day and when she wasn't doing that she was in the sub floors running the obstacle course or target practice. Sam was right there with her. He was a constant presence while she ran herself into the ground. It was the only way she could sleep through the nights. If she didn't, if she just gave in and curled up on the couch with twizzlers and a Supernatural marathon, then she'd dream of the diner, of the memories her mind created. She had grown up in the Red Room. Had know death and destruction and poise and grace. Now, her nightmares consisted of high school. Of halls and lockers and faceless crowds of students. Of a life she never had. Of a boy she had pictured an entire future with. So she fought it. Tooth and nail. She pushed herself until she collapsed and didn't dream of his face, of his embrace, of him - at all. Sam was there for her, through it all.

For two months he pushed himself harder to keep up with her. His shooting became near perfect, and his runs through the obstacle course with his wings helped him come up with new maneuvers and reach faster speeds. He made dinner for her and often times invited Steve and Bucky over to join them and sometimes when he knew she had had a rough week, they'd all settle in for a movie marathon. It didn’t take long for her to start seeking him out at night if she couldn’t sleep, and no matter what, he was willing to listen. He never pried, never acted like she owed him any kind of explanation, instead he let her talk until she couldn’t keep her eyes open and she ended up falling asleep in his bed. He even answered any questions she asked, no matter how personal, so if she didn’t want to sit in silence but didn’t want to open up either, she didn't have too. He became the person she relied on.

However, while the four of them became more solid as a unit, the team effort Steve and Tony had been functioning on was quickly crumbling. Tony began to annoy Steve. Not in the way like before, but choosing to argue with whatever Steve said. If Steve thought pizza sounded good, Tony would want Thai food. Steve wanted to watch How to Train A Dragon, Tony put on Grease. Steve mentioned a book he wanted to read, Tony would tell him how it ended. Steve had been more stressed than usual and constantly second-guessing himself. Bucky was big enough to admit, to only Natasha and himself, in Russian, that a small part of him hated how much Tony's opinion mattered to Steve. A bigger part of him, though, worried that Steve would lose what little confidence he had in leading and cause the team to have to turn to Tony. It'd be a cold day in hell when Bucky followed another's orders. Natasha was inclined to agree.

It wasn't that she had anything against Tony. In fact out of the two of them, Natasha was more like Tony than Steve. That's what made her weary. She knew, instinctually, that it wasn't smart for people to blindly put their trust in her, the war between S.H.I.E.L.D and Hydra had taught her that. Steve was stupidly easy to blindly follow into battle, Bucky and Sam were testaments to that, but when it came to Tony, what he needed to do to finish the mission, whatever it was, would outweigh the consequences. He was a creature of habit, results over the fallout - constantly willing to sacrifice himself was just the tip of the iceberg. So, like her, Tony was better off following Captain America into the jaws of death, or in Bucky's case, the kid from Brooklyn who was to dumb to runaway from a fight. 

In this instance the fight was finding the distributer of alien technology.  Agent Hill had resources on every continent looking into it, and when that ended up being Fury calling from Europe, Natasha silently wished she had more time.

When Fury had heard rumblings of reports of a source of power that greatly resembled Loki's staff, the first person he notified was Steve. The intel they were able to gather suggested Hydra. At Rosie's next appointment with Professor Xavier, Steve sat down and talked with Thor and Loki. The obvious plan was to go after the scepter, however, it was also agreed that they needed the whole team to get it. Which meant finding Clint Barton.

Natasha hadn’t been sure if a mission had compromised Clint – despite Coulson insisting that there hadn’t really been one – or if he had just said that to keep her from looking for him. Either way, Natasha had stayed put. She had put a stop to Tony and Sam’s searches and for two months she spent everyday trying to regain the part of her he took when he left.

So when Thor showed up at the tower with Steve one day explaining about Heimdall’s ability to see anyone and that it would take no time for Thor to find Clint, it was one thing to be told Clint was returning and completely another thing to be heading to Europe to meet him. The anger and helplessness she had been running from lashed out at everyone around her and somehow, in trying to rein it in, she finally found herself again. She wouldn't let Clint take that from her, he didn't get to take what defined her. She was ready for war. Sam would watch over her.


	5. Teammates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No beta. Probably mistakes. Was woking on my phone.
> 
> I wrote *robots* bc I can't for the life of me remember what Tony called the sentinels he sent out to the town. If someone knows and wants to message me, I'll change it.

Logically Bucky knew he had been to Europe since falling off the train. It was just the first since he had his memories back and it made him antsy. It didn't help that Steve was fussing over him about it. He chose not to mention it though, because Steve was slowly losing his mind.

Natasha wasn't speaking to Clint so much as giving him orders when needed because if anything she was professional, Clint wasn't speaking to Bucky, and Tony wasn't listening to orders. After the first fight Steve decided to split the team up. Tony led Clint, Bruce, and Thor. While Steve had Bucky, Natasha and Sam. He had hoped that once things had settled more and it became more good guys verses Hydra, then things would go back to normal. It didn't quite work out that way; the first few bases were barely managed. When they got news of another base, this one within the German borders, he had to bite the bullet - Steve called a full team meeting.

Despite the fact that it had been Steve and Tony who had been the leaders, it was Steve and Thor who stood in front of everyone.

"Now I know there have been some issues that we've let come between us. But the base we are planning to go at next is bigger than what we've seen so far. Which means there are going to be more people. Which means more danger. I'd like to think that we are all professional enough to put aside those issues so that we can make sure that everyone gets in and out as safely as possible. I can't tell you what's going to be waiting for us when we get there, but I can tell you that our best chance is working as a team."

"The Captain is right. We must join forces once again. The scepter in the wrong hands could come at a great cost."

"Yea, been there, done that. Remember, your brother, the one Steve graciously forgave like the prodigal son." Tony stated before refilling his scotch.

"Aye." Thor agreed. "Which is why, once we have regained control of the scepter I will return with it to Asgard. Steve and I have determined that it would be best if I were to continue to keep my distance from the team and focus on Rosie and my own realm." That seemed to take the fight out of most of the people in the room.

"You're not going to guilt trip me. I don't have a problem with Thor, it's Steve that I'm done with." Tony punctuated by dropping ice into his glass.

"Which is why when we're done Bucky and I will be looking for a new apartment."

"Okay, hold it. Time out. I know these past few months have been hard, but let's just put aside all that for now and do this job right. And then when we're done we can talk this all out." Sam tried to rein in the situation.

It was the best Steve could hope for for the evening, when everyone reluctantly agreed. In the five months since Loki had been to the tower, it was the first time things felt close to normal again as they openly discussed strategies.

* * *

On the outskirts of a small town, the base was in what looked like an old fortress. Hidden bunkers and tanks were placed strategically around it. They quickly lost the element of surprise when the Hulk went head on with a soldier with a grenade launcher - the hulk won. Over a hundred men poured into the snow and forest surrounding the base.

"Shit." Tony tried to take an aerial shortcut and ended up bouncing off a force field.

"Language." Bucky responded in his own impersonation of Steve which was way more spot on and way less appreciated by Steve. He didn't really notice though, too distracted with shooting the few soldiers stupid enough to try and climb the tree Bucky had chosen to be stationed in. However, it was the snort Natasha gave him that caused him to eternally groan, because Bucky'd just given the team license to mock him for eternity. Maybe he should let some soldiers make it up, Bucky was obviously bored if he could make jokes.

Between there being triple the amount of men they had been expecting and now the protective shield, Thor was convinced this was the place holding the scepter. Steve wasn't sure something bigger wasn't also going on. Their intel had mentioned that a Dr. Strucker had been seen around these parts. With the way his men were fighting it was obviously that whatever it was they were working on, he didn't want to lose. Unfortunately, that sentiment wasn't extended to the town's people. Tony released his Iron Sentinels to help keep them from getting hurt; Steve was just grateful he wasn't cackling over the comm.

"You know I'm going to want to hear whatever the story behind that is, later, right Barnes?" Sam asked carefully concealing his laughter until he got a 'Roger' back. Apparently that was just gold.

Sam was in the air pointing out formations and people coming to the team on the ground. He and Bucky kept them from being surprised. Well until he was almost taken down by a bunker than things shifted. Natasha, the closest to him, cursed as she ran to help him.

"Dammit Sam, you're not allowed to die. Someone want take care of that bunker?" She asked through the comm link. Feeling a small flare of satisfaction when Clint fired off a quick arrow. "Thanks." She huffed out, already trying to figure out if she could move Sam safely on her own. They were greatly out numbered, but he would be in to much pain if she tried to do it alone. She asked Clint to help her get him back to the quinjet. Sam made a 'team building exercise' quip under his breath just as Clint slid a hand under him and Natasha had to curse to stop the small grin from forming on her face. It was quickly wiped out when Clint was knocked backwards by something fast moving before they could even get Sam off the ground.

"You didn't see that coming?" A German accent asked before speeding off.

Clint's eloquent 'Mother Fucker' seemed to snap the urgency into Natasha to get Sam to safety.

* * *

Steve paused after taking out the men around him to check on Tony's progress when he was suddenly on the ground.

"Steve?" Bucky's voice held an edge that Steve was entirely too used to.

"There's an enhanced on the field. So heads up everyone. I didn't get a look at him though." Thor joined Steve as he got to his feet, getting ready to take on the soldier charging them.

"He's got super speed." Clint called in right before Tony announced that he'd taken down the shield.

"It appears they're lining up." Thor gestures to the hydra men.

"Yea, well they're excited." Steve held up his shield and Thor brought his hammer down against it effectively knocking down all in their path.

"Uh, Bucky?" Steve said.

"Yea, yea, I got it. Just be careful okay?" Bucky climbed down from his hideout to calm down Bruce while Thor and Steve headed into the base.

Usually calming the big green rage monster, ironically enough, was Tony's job. On the rare occasions that Bruce was a little harder to get in contact with, the two scientist had built a fail safe into Bucky's new arm in addition to the Veronica armor. It was a biochemical lock that could only be opened with the Hulks DNA. All Bucky had to do was be calm enough for the Hulk to let him approach and one touch would release a gas that stunted the gamma radiation long enough to allow Bruce to regain control. Unfortunately, the only time the gas had been tested on the Hulk was when Tony was still doing trail runs. The whole DNA lock on a metal prosthetic had not been practiced yet. Bucky really wished they hadn't waited until they were on a mission to try it out.

"Hey, uh, you?" The Hulk roared in his face before continuing to throw rubble around."Right." Bucky nodded looking around. He could climb a tree and jump on him - not really the calmest approach. "Tell you what." Bucky raised his arm, hand empty, straight into the air. "It's getting late. The sun's about to go down." The Hulk looked at him, weariness etched into his face. Bucky tried to think of words people would use to calm him down. When he had night terrors Steve would put on an old record that would pull him back to the 1940s before allowing him to remember everything. Then Steve would bring him a glass of water, pull him close, and tell him a story from their childhood to help calm his racing heart. Bucky seriously doubted any of that would work on the Hulk. If he had a flashback on a mission Natasha would talk to him in Russian. Tell him what they were doing, who the good guys and the bad guys were, why they were fighting. Bucky's doubted the Hulk would appreciate Russian. "I'm on your side. You know that, don't you?" The hulk turned to face him. "Okay, I need you to listen to me. Trust me, yea?" Bucky took a step closer, arm was still raised. "We're finished fighting for now. See?" He showed his other hand didn't have a weapon. Though the handgun tucked into the back of his pants was readily accessible if this went horribly wrong. He really loved Steve, he didn't want to go splat. "You want to go home?" He extended his arm further and surprisingly the Hulk mimicked him. With just a feather light touch he pressed against Bucky's arm and silently the gas released. The hulk stumbled away stunned but not angry, and then it was just Bucky and Bruce in the clearing.

* * *

Tony heard the call over the comm letting everyone know Bruce was back when he was in the middle of finally finding something he's always wanted - a secret door. He needed to try again to convince Pepper to let him create a secret room in the next building they do.

Tony had managed to mostly stop the erasing of data that Hydra was trying to pull when he finally got inside the fortress. It was all a little to cut and dry for a secret underground cult. However, what he gleefully stumbled upon did not disappoint. Not only did they have the scepter, but remnants of the aliens that had terrorized New York that they were using to create the weapons the Avengers kept coming across as well. Pepper hadn't let him keep any of the alien tech. He was just about to ask them all what were the chances of getting two birds with one stone, or maybe a joke about cutting off two hydra heads, when suddenly he was facing a pile of his teammates, his friends. Surrounded by the giant whale like aliens, floating in the dark sky, they were dead and utterly broken. Bruce's body mangled, not even the Hulk able to save him; Thor, paler then he'd ever seen him, reaching out to his hammer that would no longer respond; Clint, Natasha, and Sam, only humans like him, Sam's wings snapped and flightless; and Steve, barely breathing, clutching Bucky's lifeless body to his chest with his last remaining strength, his shield, from Tony's father, torn in two. 

Somehow he had been unable to stop it. Somehow he had survived. The thought tore something inside of him. The vision disappeared as quickly as it had come, but the cold hollow feeling in his chest lingered. His only thought was he had to find a way to be better, to save them. 

 


	6. A Smile Between Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My absolutely least favourite chapter ever...
> 
> Natasha is a badass and a person. Her character for MCU in AOU was off and I want to fix that but I want her to fit in my universe too. I really want to explore her emotions of balancing being able to kill someone with her just her little finger and having her heart bruised. Bare with me.

Natasha had adapted a defense mechanism from a young age. She had been taught to use her position, as a girl, as being vulnerable, and soft, and pretty, and use it against her opponent. She was able to manipulate any situation by manipulating herself. She did this with the help of the different voices in her head. When she wanted to be fun and outgoing, she channeled Clint. When she wanted to be deadly and cunning, she channeled her handlers from the Red Room. She was a collection of people. She meant what she said to Steve, on that drive to New Jersey. The truth is a matter of circumstance. Its not all things, to all people, all the time, and neither was she. 

When she joined S.H.I.E.L.D, when she had found her place working beside Clint, was the first time she had ever really wished to know who she was, instead of who she needed to be. It was easy to slip in and out of characters around strangers. Clint was the first person to tell her to stop. She was confident in herself. In her abilities. A first meeting and she would catalogue four way to take them down. She knew how to use the quirk of her lips and the flittering of her eyelashes to get information. She knew how to read people and to know who she needed to be in that moment. Clint was never that easy. He wanted her to be her and she didn't know who that was at the time. 

Now years later, now after the fall of SHIELD and the exposer of her past, of her identies, she had thought she had figured it out. However, as she stood there in the room, watching Sam being mended by machines and plastic she fought the feeling of being back at square one. Once again, she didn't know who to be in front of Clint. She was confident in her skills as a master assasin and spy, but as a lover, a partner in maybe the most important relationship in her life, she failed. She could manipulate any situation, but she couldn't manipulate her heart. She had learned long ago how to ignore it, being eighteen and utterly broken will do that to you, but she couldn't push away this ache. She could either shut down, or fake it until she makes it. 

Sam didn't offer her much choice.

"I guarantee that your girlfriend won't even be able to tell the diference." The doctor was telling Sam as he was patched up. He was laying on the table, shirt off, watching as the scan of light stitched him back together.

"Well good, because she would be pretty furious if I had to keep my shirt on." He teased. It was for Natasha's benefit. The joke directed to her to snap her out of her thoughts. She roled her eyes at him. "Won't be able to keep her hands off me." He added. The response, the sound of a door slamming from the connecting room - Clint. She met Sam's eyes. He offered a small smile, but the ache stayed.

* * *

Immediately after returning to the quinjet, while Natasha had tried to stop the bleeding from the gaping wound in Sam's side, Clint had called Agent Hill. It took no time at all to relay the needed information to her so that she could phone in the proper people to be ready when they arrived back at the tower, which meant a lot of awkward silence afterwards between the three of them. Clint could practically see the questions Natasha wanted to ask as they crossed her face before she forceably pushed them to the back of her mind to focus on Sam - though he seemed like he was up for a distraction. Clint wasn't going to make things easy for them. He was pretty sure he could counter every one of their questions for one of his own. Like what the fuck was going on with them. He refused to cave first. He'd suffered in silence with the ache in his chest for some time now, he could stand it a little while longer.

It took almost an hour for Bruce and Bucky to arrive. 

Clint was kind of a big picture guy. Saw things from a far. Instead of focusing on each gear individually he watched the clock. It was one of those super obvious things that no one really paid attention too. Which was why he could see from a mile a way that having Tony, Thor and Steve walking back from the base by themselves was going to end horribly for everyone. Things had been tense between the two 'leaders' before he had pulled his disappearing act, but now it was just full on childish - for both of them. Tony was the younger child throwing a fit when he didn't get his way and Steve was the older steadily ignoring him, sure that Tony would eventually tire himself out. Except they were grown ass men. 

He didn't want to think about what would happen if the team did split up, he wasn't entirely sure were he fit now, except with S.H.I.E.L.D, but he knew it would be almost impossible to pick a side. In the begining, when they were first starting out, one giant step for mankind and all that, Steve and Tony had actually been the perfect co-captains - apart from the arguing. Tony's veiw of reality balanced out Steve's idea of old school ideals. Steve's strategies helped smooth out Tony's off the cuff surprises. That was before they found Bucky. Bucky was his own kind of ying to Steve's yang, and Clint watched as Steve's edges became more razor sharp and his battle plans more forceful. At first, Clint had calmly reported back to Coulson that the Winter Soldier was brain washing Captain America. Him freaking out wouldn't have actually helped in taking down the master assasign so he hadn't bothered. However, it all happened while Bucky was still under S.H.I.E.L.D's care and Coulson in no way had seemed shocked or even scared by Clint's assessment. 'It's not the Winter Soldier', he had said, 'It's Barnes'. He hadn't really known how to take that bit of information but he continued to watch from a distance and saw that Steve wasn't becoming more deadly or agigitated like one might assume, like he had assumed, instead Steve was becoming more protective. Which was something Clint could certainly understand. The closer Steve and Bucky got the less Steve needed Tony to balance out his leadership with the team and the less Tony felt like he was needed, the bigger the rift between the two had gotten. Now, he wasn't sure if it was one that could be bridged.

He had felt the sinking feeling of being right when the trio had returned to the quinjet almost an hour after Bucky and Bruce, and the air had a distinct taste of 'foot-in-mouth', and Tony was holding that look he got when something had shaken him and  he lashed out with false bravado to try and cover it up. It was best described as a constipated look. By the way Steve was hunched as he walk steadfast to the empty seat next to Bucky, it wasn't hard to guess who the target had been.

Thor had been the one to address them all. Explaining the weapons and the files and finding the scepter. Tony argued for three days to study it before Thor left, it being 'the least he could do' and after Tony emailed Agent Hill the files he had found he informed the team that a going away party would be happening tonight at the tower - 'After all Thor and Cap are leaving for the forseeable future'. Even Clint wanted to hit him.

He didn't want to go to the party. He didn't want to socialize or dress up. He absolutely did not picture what Natasha might wear or how the nights events might play out. And he completely ignored the hole in his own chest when he watched Natasha and Sam whispering to eachother from the corner of his eye.

He wasn't going to pick sides between warring captains and he wasn't going to get on his knees and beg for the love of his life to take him back. Bruce offered him a small consolingly smile, despite wearing sound proof headphones he seemed like he knew exactly what was going on around him, but it didn't nothing to quell the bitter taste in the back of his mouth. 


	7. It's a Party

"Alright, let me see. Turn." Darcy directed Natasha as she did a slow spin in her olive green lace pencil skirt and black sleeveless silk top. Her gold heels clacked on the hardwood floor of Pepper's closet. "Um, four?" she guessed.

"Six." Natasha corrected as she began to reveal the weapons she had hidden on her person.Despite the fact they were getting ready for Tony's party, Natasha always seemed ready to kick ass and take names. Darcy might have a slight woman crush.

They didn't often get to hang out together - Pepper, Jane, Darcy, Natasha, Maria. On the even rarer occasion when Coulson's team weren't on a mission, the women all got together at the shooting range in the subbasement of the Avenger Tower for a friendly competition before ending the night with cheeseburgers and wine. Darcy had brought up the idea of them conquering the world once or twice, when she'd had to many glasses. But they all agreed it was more fun to let the men pretend they had everything under control.

Darcy knew things had been tense around the tower for a few months now. However, this was a party, and a party was the perfect place to pretend the booze had loosened your tongue and stick your nose where it didn't belong. It was how she learned about Maria and her new beau, the agent secretly itching to spill to someone. It was also how she found herself cornering Clint by the bar under the pretense of showing off the multitude of pictures she and Jane had taken of Rosie.

"She's a cute kid." He responded distractedly.

"She's adorable." She corrected. "And Loki is amazing with her. It was kind of shocking at first, because you know, the whole thing, but Thor trusts him. So." She trailed off. Clint wasn't paying attention. Not really. He was watching Bruce and Natasha, Sam and Maria talking over by the windows. "I'm glad to see he's okay." Darcy spoke again, tilting her head toward Sam. "I don't know what she'd have done if it had been more serious." Clint nodded, but his face looked liked he'd been punched. "She doesn't always feel like she fits here, you know. Kind of perpetually stuck on the outside." She whirled her scotch glass watching him closely. "So I heard you went on a trip recently. Skye and I skype sometimes and she mentioned Coulson was worried about you. Something about you not being where you were suppose to be." Clint had already clammed up. He was minutes from walking away from here. She threw out a small laugh and slipped her phone from his slacked grip. "But, I don't know. I'm going to go show Bucky the new pics of Rose. Catch you later." She tipped her glass to him and walked off first.

* * *

 Steve and Thor observed Darcy playing Clint like a fiddle before she decided she had enough fun and went to find a new target. Steve hoped it wouldn't be him. Thor had offered an Asgardian ale to him and Bucky hoping they would be able to enjoy it because none of Tony's drinks had any affects on the super soldiers. He was maybe starting to feel a bit of a buzz, but wasn't planning on drinking enough to really find out if he could get hammered. Thor and Steve were listening along with other men from the V.A to Rhodey tell one of his famous stories that men of action always loved to hear. It wasn't the first time he had heard the story. Rhodey usually cycled through the best ones at Tony's parties. So when Sam signaled him from across the room at the bar, he excused himself quietly. He noticed Thor slip away too, not ten seconds behind him, to Jane's side.

When he reached Sam, the man clinked his glass against his own before using it to gesture to Bucky. Darcy had found her mark, but for now seemed to be playing nice.

"You want to talk about it?" Sam asked after a moment. Steve figured he purposely kept it vague since so much had happened while the team was in Europe. However, the answer was still no - no matter what the topic. This in-fighting was causing him to close himself off from the others. Suddenly self-conscious and unsure with every thought he had. Talking about it would probably only cause more problems in the end. "Moving out of the Tower, man, that's kind of a big deal. You know. It's become home. And Barnes hasn't lived anywhere else since he was released from S.H.I.E.L.D. That's a big move, taking him away from the majority of his support system." Steve didn't appreciate the implication that he would do anything that would be bad for Bucky.

"Actually, it was his idea. Thought it might be time for us to move back to Brooklyn. Get our own place. And any place with Buck is home to me. The Towers nice and having everyone around is comforting, but it's not realistic. Bucky's doing really well, but he needs to interact with more people than just the team. I talked to his therapist before we officially decided anything. I'm not going to jeopardize his happiness just because I'm uncomfortable living under Tony's roof." Steve groused. Sam only smiled and Steve realized too late the trap he walked into.

"So you admit that Tony's getting to you?"

"Shut it."

"Language." Bucky chided as he came up to wrap an arm around Steve's waist. Sam chuckled, but both were waiting for him to answer the damn question. They all had long since learned how Tony tended to rant and ramble without real thought to consequences when his mind was otherwise engaged. Steve had known that something had happened at the base that Tony hadn't told them. Tony had sounded strained. Overly confident and with a false bravado which almost instantly made anything coming out of his mouth as dismissible. However, when he began to rattle on about how he more or less single handedly won the war. The others having been distractions at best, and that it was possible, now that Steve would be out of the tower, that Tony becoming the new team leader would allow missions to run more smoothly. Steve didn't know how to put that into words without Bucky ending up wanting to throttle Tony. "Tony believes he'd make a better leader." Steve simply stated. He felt more than saw Bucky tense and freeze almost immediately at his words. They both knew that Steve and Natasha were the only two people that Bucky trusted implicitly with orders - missions or otherwise. Sam was a close third for him, but Steve wasn't even sure if Tony made the list.

"Did he tell you that?" Sam asked, not hiding his obvious dislike for the idea. It wasn't that Tony was a bad guy. The opposite actually. Sam had come to his lab once in the middle of the night, Stark long past the too much caffeine mark. He had caught Sam off guard by abruptly asking about his nightmares from the war and the PTSD he still dealt with - even though he was counselling others. Stark seemed to believe that its was better to not talk about the images behind his eye lids and the onset of panic that would suddenly drown him. He didn't think that someone should be allowed to help another if they were still suffering, and he believed you would always suffer. Sam hadn't been able to get much through to him that night, but it opened his eyes to the man Tony was. He feared that the responsibility of leading the team would be to much on the man. Steve had taken up the mantle begrudgingly, however being a war veteran allowed him to be more prepared for calling out orders and the consequences that could follow. Tony didn't really have that.

"Did Steve tell you we actually found a place?" Bucky changed off the tense subject. "Some architect decided to make loft apartments out of a couple of old warehouse down by the dock. One of 'em was were I worked for a spell. The old neighborhoods gone, but it's kind of like a piece of home." He gave Steve a squeeze, helping to relax him. "You'll have to throw us a house warming party - we like free stuff." Bucky winked at Sam. He laughed and agreed.

Maria came to steal Sam away and Bucky pulled Steve on to a nearby couch to listen to one of Jane's stories involving Rosie. Things quickly settled and the night was looking good.

 


	8. All Systems Failing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So so sorry about the unexpected hiatus - life got in the way.

The party had been one of Tony's best. The music had been perfectly selected, Pepper had stocked the bar with the Avengers favorites, and Stanley, the security guard at the Smithsonian who had gotten fired when Steve stole his old uniform to face Bucky in the helicarrier, had come at Steve's request dressed in his WWII uniform and ready to swap war stories with the veterans. Stanley was also celebrating his new job as a postman thanks to Sam - turns out their paths had crossed more than once at the VA in D.C. So, all in all, it was a good party until a HOMICIDAL DEATH BOT crashed it at the end of the night and tried to kill them.

Thankfully all of the guest including Jane and Darcy had left the Tower, the only civilians left had been Pepper and the Dr. Cho. Sam and Maria took to covering them while the team fought the seemingly endless supply of Iron Sentinels and there leader - Ultron. At the end they were all a lot worse for wear, but thankfully very much alive. Though the same could not be said about the room. The floor of the Tower designated for hosting affairs, such as Tony's renowned parties, had been devastatingly destroyed. In fact some of the furniture still held simmering flames.

"I don't understand." Tony spoke manically over the others shouts of ' _What the hell exactly was that_?'. "Why didn't Jarvis notify us? Why didn't the system override kick in? It doesn't make sense." He fought blindly through the debris of his once again ruined home and his teammates in a desperate bid to get to his workshop.

What little hope he had left about the situation was sucker punched from his chest when he found Jarvis completely shattered beyond saving. Suddenly, he couldn't breathe. Tony didn't know if it was because there was suddenly no air in the room or if his lungs simply stopped working.

Their was weight, a rock, no a boulder, on his chest. He couldn't make his lungs expand. He couldn't stop his thought from spiraling. The one thing, no the one being, that had always been there was gone. Suddenly ripped away. The feeling was not un-similar to when the arc reactor was forcibly removed from his chest. It was all systems failing. He couldn't work without Jarvis.

Spot were forming in his vision. His fingers working without his awareness. Tony was searching, striving to find even a scrap of his best friend to save, repair, rebuild him.

But suddenly there were hands on his face and a firm but tender voice fighting to break through his hysterical thoughts.

 

* * *

 

Pepper's heart felt like it was breaking. Tony seemed unaware of the tears that streamed down his face or the steady mantra of _nononono please dear god no_ he was mumbling just loud enough for them to hear the stricken panic in his voice as it shook. She rushed to comfort him. To offer some form of reassurance that not all was lost, but she knew that little compared to the bond he held for the A.I.

She had no sooner gotten the panic to subside and the tears to stop, before Bucky was in both of their faces. Pepper has a special place in her heart for all the members of the team and had spent one on one time with Bucky on more than one occasion in the shooting range. She cared and sympathized for him deeply, but she was not going to stand for his brash behavior now, in a moment like this.

Before he can even open his moth, Pepper forcibly placed herself between the soldier and her Tony - "Stand down." she commanded. Tone sharp and eyes dangerous, she held herself tall and planted herself.

"In case you forgot, we all just almost died." Bucky told her. His voice was deathly calm and she tried to fight off the chills that chased up her spine because of it.

"We all wanted answers. But attacking him right now will help no one." She refused to back down.

"It would help me." He grumbled. Bucky only truly stepped down when Steve moved to place a hand on the small of his back.

"Stark, explain. And maybe Banner can fill in any of your gaps." The stress of the unexpected fight caused Steve to fall back to his army days; stern voice and sharp commands. Pepper could feel Tony's pulse still racing too fast under her fingertips around his wrist. Her touch barely enough to ground him in reality.

"It was." Tony paused, searching the room as if a child lost. He gulped audibly, "It was what we were all working for. It was suppose to fix us." He shook his head. Pepper squeezed his hand, trying to bring him back again. "Things are broken. I see it. You see it." He gestured to Steve. "We're all going in different direction. This was suppose to fill in the gaps we were creating." He searched out Bruce in the group of heroes.

"Ultron." Bruce stepped forward. "he was a program we had designed. An idea to create a self regulating robot. It had all been theoretical. We didn't have the materials," he paused searching for a word while his eyes roamed the destroyed lab. "The energy. We needed it, him, to have self sustaining energy. The staff, it's power, gave us the means to try it. There was no way to know." His voice trailed off, though even Pepper heard the unsaid words - _it would turn out like this._ It would destroy everything.

 


End file.
